Helping you and your children make it through divorce

The need to regulate your own responses cannot be overstated. Your anger, depression or anxiety can cause lifelong problems for your children. Remember, just because negative reactions emerge does not make them true or useful. Self-help techniques can help you stay in control. You can find some in my book, Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life with Self-Help Techniques from EMDR Therapy. For instance, one adult client kept rehashing a fight. Another child client kept seeing his father angrily walk out the door for the last time. You can help yourself and your children get rid of distressing mental pictures by imagining it on top of paint in a can. Then, just stir it up. That disrupts "working memory" and makes it go away. You can also use other techniques to immediately change negative emotions or thoughts. This will empower both you and your children. It will also allow you to be present with your children and show enough happiness so they don't feel like they have to take care of you. No child deserves that burden. [Exceprt]

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Francine Shapiro

Shapiro, F. (2012, August 29). Helping you and your children make it through divorce. Huffington Post. Retrieved from on http://www.huffingtonpost.com/francine-shapiro-phd/helping-you-and-your-chil_2_b_1837948.html?utm_hp_ref=divorce-advice 9/5/2012.